Jesus' General Prays for the Dems

Jesus' General: "Dear Lord, Why is it that every single time there is a strong Pro-Life, Pro-War, Pro-Family Values politician with the potential for propagating our cause, that they either end up in a scandal involving a male-intern, foot-tapping in a restroom stall, or simply lose steam and pull out of an important election? Do you honestly want a Mormon, a Yankee adulterer, some dirty old man with a sluttish looking young wife, or some hillbilly from Arkansas who couldn’t find his way out of an open refrigerator box, running your chosen nation? Why have Thou forsaken us like this? Do you want the Demoncrats to win the election in 08’? Help us out here, Father, and send us a man with morals, a case full of automatic weapons, a closet with no skeletons, and a wife who knows how to dress and keep her mouth shut. Otherwise, Lord, I dare say we may end up with that pro-baby killing, pro-sodomite, anti-America, militant-feminazi Hillary as President. And just what do you think that will accomplish? Amen. Sincerely, Your Friend and Biggest Fan Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett"